


Thoughts at the Desk

by ThistleBrows



Category: LXG, The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-26
Updated: 2017-05-26
Packaged: 2018-11-05 07:30:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11008809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThistleBrows/pseuds/ThistleBrows
Summary: Henry Jekyll sits with his journal by the midnight candle and contemplates. Brief oneshot. Post-movie, in London.





	Thoughts at the Desk

Sitting at his desk in the yellow candlelight, Henry Jekyll closed his journal and sighed. There was nothing left to journal about. It had been so uneventful lately. He had even become so bored as to start practicing good penmanship. His had always been less than exemplar. Side effects of the profession, he supposed.

Although it hurt, Henry had even become so desperately bored as to welcoming Edward’s caged rages. Yes, the suffocation and blackouts were unpleasant and drew concerned attention, but it gave him something to fight against. A way for him to exert himself. In a way, he welcomed the pain. Every struggle against Edward was his duty. He owed it to the world. 

Maybe he even enjoyed the excitement of the struggle. He was restless. He had tried writing to-do lists and tried to pursue old hobbies, but the lists were completed promptly, and the hobbies unfulfilling without another with which he could pursue them.

Frankly, Henry was lonely. All of his hobbies and interests could not fulfill the role of a companion. And despite growing up and living in London, he found himself friendless upon return. For all its stress and terror and emotional strain, his brief time with the League was one of the most engaging times of his life. He needed something like that again, but didn’t think that rejoining the League was necessarily the solution. At least not at this point in time. Besides, there was nothing to do there at present.

Henry considered trying some of the local societies, but always imagined being out of place or not enjoying himself. Frankly, he was a little scared to try and socialize. He wasn’t the same person now that he had been when he left, or rather, fled.

He considered his occupation – with his name cleared, it would be possible to work as a chemist, but he had no desire to do so anymore. And his area was such that it did not lend itself well to related subfields. he did not know what he could do with his area of expertise outside of the obvious pursuits to which he now objected.

And so, his pace of life became nigh unbearably slow. Taking walks, browsing papers and brochures, and journaling became slow and leisurely pursuits. His penmanship improved in bounds. He tried to find gatherings or events in town with which to amuse himself but little proved of interest. It seemed quite impossible in such a large city. He knew something must be out there which would suit him. He simply needed to find it.

Tomorrow, at least, would prove eventful. He had a meeting with an old colleague with whom he had recently renewed their acquaintanceship. Henry had shared little so far of his life and experiences since the experiments, but was grateful for the positive and receptive understanding response he had received thus far. He had assumed that all of London had heard of him and his scandal by now.

There was another Henry also planned to meet for dinner- the son of his landlord, an aspiring lad with hopes for an education in the sciences. It was his landlord’s idea that they share dinner. Henry was determined that he should keep in touch with this lad. He could not bear it if his only interactions were only between himself and his kind, yet emotionally distant landlord. Still, a good father.

The thought had more than once crossed his mind to revisit his old friends. But every time he imagined doing so, he couldn’t imagine what he would say. Henry’s face crumpled, remembering the hell he had put Utterson through, and then his swift departure! No explanation, no letter. What would Utterson say? No, Henry couldn’t do that to Utterson. The man deserved to go about his life in peace.

Henry looked at his watch, sitting atop some papers. He picked it up. It was a modest but nevertheless elegant thing- a fine replacement for the one lost when the Nautilus had been sabotaged. Henry had always found himself attracted to the aesthetic of watches, although it was only until recently with his newfound free time that he’d bothered to do any proper research on the subject.

He looked at his reflection on the watch’s inside lid. The back of Hyde’s head was to him, sleeping most probably. Henry didn’t know if he could much discern now between the person he’d lived as for most of his adult life- the respectable doctor, or the more recent person he’d become, which he’d kept buried for so many years. There was no hiding his flaws now. They showed on him like scars or marks from his experiments. And even more damning, his worst side was just below this rough surface, always ready to come out. Now Henry told himself that it was what he did with himself now, rather than in the past, that determined the sort of man he was. It was the only way he could be good.

Up until he joined the League, he hadn’t been so sure. How can a man call himself good, when his alter ego roams the streets committing atrocities? But he’d had a chance to redeem himself, and he’d succeeded to a large degree. Despite the deceptions under which he had joined, he did receive amnesty from Her Majesty’s government. He was here, on English soil again.

Nothing had changed, but it did not feel like the London he had known.

Henry set the watch back on the desk and retired to bed. There was nothing to be had from these thoughts. He must look to tomorrow and prepare for his social engagements. They were the first he’d had in a long time.


End file.
